December 7, 2014

I caught my reflection a few too many times today and I hated what I saw.

Whether it was a mirror, sliding door or someone else’s sunglasses, all I saw was a washed out, sick-looking woman in a hat!

My hair is now about 85% gone at a guess so I wore a hat I bought the other day – first to Abbey’s end of year dance concert and then to drinks at the Cottesloe Beach Hotel for Courtney’s 21st birthday drinks.

I didn’t feel comfortable for one minute today. I felt like the hat screamed “I have cancer”. I didn’t think I looked that bad until I caught my reflection and each time I couldn’t move away quick enough.

I didn’t think losing my hair and wearing a hat would affect me so much but it is.

I feel quite vulnerable and powerless – this disease is taking more from me each day.

All this on a day when Abbey danced in her first end of year concert for All Star Dance. She did a hip hop routine. It’s been a huge two days of rehearsals and concert (three hours worth) – a massive effort from us and Abbey for her to spend all of three minutes on stage! But I think she loved the experience. She looked great and danced well. Not sure whether it’s something she wants to continue with it next year or not!



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